Blessed are the cheese-makers. Salary: $0 

You get one of the coveted slots at the UN. Your first day on the job you mistakenly tell everyone that the French Ambassador eats cheese in his underwear instead of that he is honored to be in attendance. They kick you out before his speech is even done.

Protect them, Holy Farter. Salary: $60,000 

While translating an important religious text on your computer, you mistakenly replace all instances of the word Father with farter and the text gets 100,000 books printed and distributed without anyone realizing it. When they do, the Vatican is not pleased.

¿Cómo se dice "Get me out of here"? Salary: $80,000 

Business is slow so you book a private job translating Spanish to English for a client from an ad on Craigslist. When you are flown to the jungle and your escort is carrying an Uzi, you realize you've made a huge mistake.

You deserve a medal already. Salary: $90,000 

Your first job out of school you are hired as an interpreter at a local free health clinic. You spend your days helping hundreds of people understand their doctors. The doctors, in turn, are relieved to finally be able to do their job and treat sick patients—which they couldn't do until you showed up. You are something of a local hero. It feels good to use your powers to help people and make a difference.

Baller status. Salary: $210,000 

You are hired as personal interpreter to the President of the United States. He and the First Lady adore you and consider you a close personal friend and an invaluable member of the team. You are given an open invitation to hang out at the White House any time and have dinner with the family. You even stay over a few times because you work late and are given the Lincoln bedroom, which is extremely cool and has all the cable stations on the TV that you don't get at home. You make lots of money and travel to exotic lands all while serving your country. Life is good.